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Caring for One Another

Almost every day I hear some word of gratitude for what this community means in your lives. Some talk about the connections they make here and about how they feel accepted. Some express that they got a surprising amount of support after lighting a candle about a sorrow. It is quite common to hear that this community just ‘feels like home’...a place to belong and a safe place to walk a spiritual path.

But I’ve also heard it said that we’re not all that great at caring for one another. I can only guess at what this means, but the fact that it’s been spoken at all most assuredly means that there are those who have felt - during times of crisis, transition, illness, etc – that they didn’t receive the care or support that they needed. They expected more. They expected more of us.

This is troubling. Yet, we do have the resources to care for one another. Ours is a shared ministry, and each of us can offer some kind of care and support. Let me offer a few ideas; feel free to add your own!

 

  1. Come to Sunday morning service thinking of yourself as a host in your own home. Take the opportunity to get to know others. Slide over in the pew to make room. Introduce yourself to someone you don’t know at coffee hour. If they’re a newcomer, introduce them to others, see if you can answer any questions, or give them a tour of the building. Do what you can do make them feel comfortable.
  2. Take what is offered during our Candles of Joy and Sorrow seriously. Challenge yourself to remember what was shared. Don’t assume that someone else is looking after it. Even if you don’t know someone well, reach out and offer a kind word.
  3. Take a moment now and then to browse through our directory, and find a name of someone you haven’t seen in a while, or who you know to be struggling. Give them a call, drop them a card, or even call ahead and then stop by for a visit. You might choose to become a regular ‘buddy’ to one particular person who is in need of a friend. Sometimes what we need most is simply to be reminded that others care and are thinking of us. Come and talk to me if you’re unsure of how to offer support to someone.
  4. Don’t ask what you can do, or suggest that they call you if they need something. Simply offer to do something concrete and helpful. Ask if you can come over and change the linens. Or, when you’re on the way to buy groceries, call and ask what you can pick up for them. When doing some baking or cooking, put aside something extra to drop off. Pick some spring flowers and bring them by to brighten someone’s day.
  5. Send a "You are Special" card to a child or adult who has done something of note, such as participating in a piano recital, getting a new job, or taking on or completing a Fellowship volunteer job.
  6. Put a couple of birthdays on your calendar and then acknowledge that day with a call or a card.
  7. Give somebody a hug.
  8. Call upon the congregational structures we have in place. We have a Minister’s Discretionary Fund that can provide some financial support. We have a list of people willing to prepare food and offer rides. And, I am always honoured to visit and to offer pastoral care.
  9. Ask those who are hurting if you can share their situation with others. If so, light a candle for them. Let their friends know. Call a few others to help you support this person.
  10. And, if you’re the one needing some support, muster up your courage to ask for it. Remember that being on the receiving end is just as much a part of the caring circle as is being on the giving end. Others want to help you.

We’ve been considering creating a Caring Team who would be more intentional about reaching out. But if you can do just one of these things, we’ll all reap the benefits. Truly, as part of this chosen community, we are all responsible to each other. Participating in a circle of care, whether giving or receiving, is one important source of deep meaning in our lives.

See you on Sunday!
Julie